I had forgotten what an outpouring this one was…
#1c. The only heartfelt and sincere Valentine’s card, nay, declaration of profound affection, I have ever received
I’m not going to be cruel and expose the sender. What I remember is that I didn’t share his feelings at the time of sending. In fact I was really surprised he felt so strongly about me at all. I’d had no idea.
But now I read it back, I wonder how on earth I could have turned him down. Seriously. No one has EVER said such nice things about me in writing. I don’t think. Memory is a cruel mistress.
What’s worse is that also in the box is my draft response, annotated by the now editor of a well-known music magazine, where I basically say: ‘Thanks, but I don’t feel the same way. Have a nice life.’ My editor friend made gentle suggestions of how to be kinder which I sincerely hope I followed. Again, I have no recollection of how I really responded. I really hope I was gentle. After all, I definitely knew at this point in my life what it felt like to be the carrier of an unrequited love. But more on that another time.
I hope he’s happy now, and that he’s met someone better than he thought I was then.
And I hope this isn’t the last time I ever see such generous words about me in writing. Next time hopefully I won’t be so dismissive. But who knows what further idiocy lies in my future…