More mismatches

On Friday night, PJ came over and critiqued my online profile. ‘Let’s have a look at your matches then,’ he said.

I showed him the railway enthusiast, and the sci-fi geek* and some of the more normal ones.

‘None of these are really you though are they? Maybe you should change your profile…’

We rewrote it. He suggested sarcastic answers and I decided not to use them. But I did strip what I’d writen back, and tried to make what I said about myself a little less generic…

I hit save and entirely forgot about it. Until last night, that is, when he texted me to ask if my matches had improved. I love his optimism that a couple of tweaks would transform the kind of men being matched to me. ‘I’ve not even looked,’ I replied. ‘Hang on.’

I had a few new matches. In general the new batch were Catholic classical music lovers – which isn’t bad, just, well, not very, me. In among them was a fashion stylist (so we’d never hit it off – I’m still wearing Tesco’s own Spring/Summer 2003 range) who wrote that the last book he read was called I Kissed Dating Goodbye and it revolutionised his life. On a dating website. I’m not sure how that contradiction is working for him. Maybe he’s planning to skip straight to marriage…

Then there are my existing matches. I’ve been a bit paranoid that I’ll see the local matches around. And this Saturday I’m fairly sure I did see one – about to launch into a fight at Clapham Junction on Saturday night…

Still, I press on, smiling at people, asking questions, hoping nobody on my bus suddenly gets recommended for me, trying to understand how people actually meet and fall in love using one of these sites. It’s a mystery to me so far.

*I don’t have anything against rail enthusiasts and sci fi geeks – I like travelling on the train, and am pretty evangelical about the sleeper to Edinburgh. I’ve watched enough sci fi to almost be classed as one, and I’m very fond of Leonard and Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory. I just don’t think I’d want to date someone who enjoys going to Star Trek conferences. Or who thinks a good day out is standing with a notepad at the end of platform 16 at Clapham Junction station. There are limits.


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