So in the wake of official date number five, I think I might be having a crisis of feminist conscience. Someone said to me recently that their mother had given them a rule of thumb for dates: You look pretty, they pay the bill.
I thought this sounded quite good advice, and being fed lovely food by someone who wants to treat you is fair recompense, I think, for the time spent prepping yourself, picking (or purchasing) an outfit, and generally making sure you are both pretty and charming company for the evening. It’s a fair trade-off, right?
But I wonder if this can backfire? What if, for example, the guy decides to take you somewhere exceptionally nice and really go all out to treat you? What if you couldn’t afford to split the bill even if you wanted? And what if, at the end of all that, you’ve had a lovely time, but you’d probably be happy to end the night with a kiss on the cheek at most? If they’ve spent a lot of money on you, do you somehow owe them a greater return on their investment?
I know the feminist answer is ‘of course not’ but is that impolite? Any thoughts?